197.0 1:30pm

This year has been tough. I've seen as high as 206.0 (morning weight) on the scale and haven't seen below 190.0. I've struggled mentally with a mild depression and have gone off the rails with ice cream/cookies/cake again and again. I will almost binge eat on that junk for several days and then as I watch my weight steadily rise each day (I still try to weigh in EVERY day), I will get a handle on it. I don't know what the long term solution is beyond weighing every day, remaining keto, and weighing/measuring everything + logging it for the rest of my life. My tendency to let a non-lowcarb treat turn in to a bunch of junk for days has been a reoccurring theme for so long. I hate it and yet when I am on track for a while, I get to thinking I am doing great and can afford to go off plan. It sucks. I've struggled with lethargy as well this year. I just don't have the energy I wish I had. Obviously walking would be a good step towards getting more energy. I also could stand to get more sunlight. I had PRK surgery in May and have tried to stay out of the sun for months to let my eyes heal as well as they possibly could. (I am currently at 20/10 so am super happy with the surgery outcome). I don't know, I just wish it was easier than it has been. I think about and struggle with my weight soooooo much for being 200 pounds. I eat well at least 80% of the time, but that 20% is enough to keep me at this weight.

202.2 (8am)

I was 204.4 yesterday at 8am. That was a carb bloated weight.

195.2 2pm

Woke up at 2pm. Yesterday food 783 calories, 45 g. fat, 40.3 g carb (25.8 g. NET carbs), 62.4 grams protein.

196.0 9:30 am

Low carb low food for about a week.

205.0 9am

203.2 (9am)

So this weight was preceded by ice cream, birthday cake, cookies, chips and salsa, and a lot in the way of quantities. I think I am the fattest I have been in years. Not good.

195.8 (10am)

I have been solidly in the upper 190's for the last 8-10 months I think. I have tried and tried to at least get back to the lower 180's and just continue to struggle. Today is the 2nd day of weighing/logging everything in fitday. I have had about 1000 low carb calories each day. I am going to log/weigh/calorie restrict/carb restrict for a while and see if I can't get back to a little lower, more comfortable weight. I just feel like my stomach/liver is really bloated huge lately. But I keep struggling. I will do well for a few days and then blow it with an ice cream/candy mix treat or blow it by being low carb but just eating in a real almost binging manner. It's tough. I've been struggling for so long.

199.0 (9:30am)

I am really continuing to struggle. Yesterday I was 200.4 lbs.

196.0 10:30am

I ate 2 cups of fried rice yesterday, 5 chocoloate chip cookies, 10 thin mints and a bunch of m&m's as well as about 20 oz of steak. So this is a carb bloated weight.

194.4 10:30am

My weight is gradually coming down. I am really struggling. I want to get back to my normal 180's weight.

197.6 (9am)

I have struggled all month. I also feel like I had high progesterone all month. I keep trying.

198.8 (11am)

My weight has gotten out of hand in the last month. I have put on a real 10 pounds. So that sucks. Two days ago, my 7am weight was 200.0. Unacceptable. And YET, for the last two days I have failed in the afternoon and basically binged in the evening. I am really struggling here. I have got to white knuckle it through getting my insulin down. Just feel really out of control. I am just taking today hour by hour. It's going to be tough.