186.6 lbs (7:30am)

Wow. Up 10 pounds from 4 days ago. I should be up about 2.5 pounds I think from excess calories. I think I probably have an extra 2 pounds of food weight in my body right now and 5 pounds of water weight gain. I will be curious to see how fast it goes down. We went to the Chinese Buffet for my husbands birthday and then on Christmas yesterday I pretty much binged all day. I am ready to be back on my low carb diet. It will feel good not to have a yucky stomach anymore.

Later that day (7:45pm)

So I ate a bunch of junk (ice cream, chips ahoy, jelly beans, junior mints, pre-made commercial frozen meatballs with bottled Mae Ploy sweet and sour sauce (which has traditionally given me MSG headaches)) this evening... my calories now stand at 2972 for the day, 146.6 grams fat, 291.5 - 18.7 fiber =272.8 NET carbs, 128.3 grams protein. I feel HORRIBLE. My stomach is all bloated and feels sick (almost like I ate something bad). I feel all bloated and sluggish. I was complaining to my husband that I had eaten a bunch of stuff that I hadn't wanted to and he pointed out that today I had also complained that my boobs hurt. Of course! My period is coming soon. I almost always lose control during PMS week. (Which normally for me only means tender boobs, tiredness and huge cravings. I don't think I generally get moody).

176.6 lbs. (8:45am) 33.4% body fat, 27.9 BMI Per Omron

Crazy. I don't think I can adequately express how odd it is mentally for me to actually be losing weight. I have tried for so long. I had become a obese girl in my head and now that I am am normal average american woman size (size 14), it's just really hard for my mind to grasp. I think it might take a year or so for my brain to accept. I have been spot on plan for the last week to maybe 10 days. I'm not sure how strict I will be on Christmas day. Losing so much weight has made it a lot easier for me to stick to my guns in family eating situations though.

Yesterday's foods (this same sort of thing (plus amounts) were eaten over the last four days actually):

11am - coffee with 125 grams half and half, powder sucralose (from Amazon), & almond extract (8 drops)

4pm - 1/4 lb pre-made frozen hamburger patty (27/73) cooked with 3.95 oz raw onions, 11.90 oz chopped green cabbage, salt, pepper and garlic powder (note that the frozen hamburger patty was chopped up as it cooked and the onions and cabbage were sauteed in the beef fat that the hamburger patty released - no fat was removed from the pan)

6pm - 60 grams cheddar cheese (slightly warmed in the microwave)

9pm - 4.07 oz raw baby carrots and 6.98 oz raw turnip (1 medium peeled)

Thoughout the day I also drank an entire 2 liter of diet mountain dew (I am having trouble stopping this bad habit) and 1 16oz Hot herbal licorice tea (Stash brand). That hot tea is amazing. You don't have to add any sweeteners or anything and it is perect.

So yesterday ended up at 960 caloies, 60.7 grams fat, 60.2 - 16.2 fiber = 44.0 grams NET carbs (this was a little higher than normal from the 9pm 4 oz of raw carrots), 48.7 grams protein

Yesterday really represents exactly the eating pattern I've been using the lose these last 62 pounds. Low calorie, strictly controlled protein amounts (that are evenly spread throughout the day) and low carb. I feel amazing eating this way. I DO miss my old treats, but it is worth it to feel (and look!) so much better.

179.0 lbs.

Today is the 2nd day in a row under 180 lbs. =) Just weird. I've now lost a total (from my highest of 261.2) of 82.2 lbs. I can't even articulate how much better my body feels and how I am treated better by strangers. It was 3 months ago today (September 19th) that I was blogging about hitting 199.0. These last 20 pounds have been slow (averaging 6.67 lbs per month, or right at 1.5 pounds per weeks), but I think it has led me to feel solidly at my weight.

181.8 (9:30am)

I was as low as 181.0 yesterday morning. I really couldn't believe it. It's just very surreal to be able to lose this weight after trying for SO MANY years and having such little success. Really dialing in my macro-nutrients has made SUCH a difference. I tried on a pair of Levi Silvertab SIZE 11 jeans I wore all the time 15 years ago and they are so close to fitting. I can zip them and everything, but they are still a little too tight on the waist band to comfortably wear. It's just hard to wrap my mind around. My husband and I decided to get a good flat screen tv for our bedroom for a joint Christmas gift. And then we were only going to exchange about $50 worth of small gifts. Two years ago he got me 5 pairs of pajamas for Christmas and I loved that gift (they are all either XL or 1X). They are all getting way to large. I told him I wanted pajamas for Christmas, but I wasn't really sure whether I needed Large or Mediums, so I went with him and picked out all my pajamas. MOST are mediums!!! They are all still a little tight, but in another 5-10 pounds should fit perfectly. I teared up in the dressing room trying on a pair of medium satin pajamas. (The same brand as another set I have at home that is an XL and was too tight for almost 2 years for me to wear. It's just really hard to wrap my head around.

So, I am firmly in ketosis again and am hoping to be able to get down to 165 by the first of February. I got down to 163 for a couple weeks back in 2001 and then rapidly gained back 30-40 pounds that fall/winter. When I met my husband (age 22) I was right at 165-167. I haven't been less than 163 since I was 21 (17 years!!!). If I can manage to get down to 163-165 I might hang out there for a little while and let my body try to stabilize for a little bit. I really don't want to lose any more hair (hair thinning from weight loss) if at all possible. I also want my skin to rebound as well as possible. I am really lucky in that I have never really had cellulite (even at 260 lbs my skin was quite smooth), but I am getting a little wrinkling in my thigh area down to my upper knees. I am hoping to end up with nice looking upper thighs (as I like to wear shorts in the summer- even at my highest weight), so I know that slow and steady will be helpful with my skin rebound.

184.8 (9:30am), 111 mg/dL BG 10:30 am (forgot Metformin dosage last night)

So, I am pleased to FINALLY be back under 185. I am going to try really hard this month to get to 179.8 lbs. I was at 182-183 for 1-3 years when I was 22-24 years in age. (Briefly getting into the 175 area and then occationally getting up to 190. This might be a hard weight for me to break through. All I can do is my best with my eating though and see what happens.

Yesterday I went to the diet doctor and got a refill on my prescription. I hadn't been in for a refill since the start of September. I was somewhat surprised that they let me get a refill, since I had missed 2 monthly appointments. Luckily I had lost 19 pounds and I think that they like to take credit for my weight loss. I would say that the diet pills help 10%. Which is worth it to me financially, because I am so desperate to get back down to a normal healthy weight. But the true trick is logging/weighing all your food, sticking to the correct macros (fat/protein/carbs) and sticking under 40 net carbs per day, while making sure that your calories are restricted somewhat. The higher the calorie restriction the faster the weight loss, but I actually think the first 3 things are more important than the rate of weight loss. Slower weight loss is better for skin recovery and well as making sure you are getting enough nutrients. Faster weight loss is great for motivation and helping you believe you can actually lose the weight. I think if I hadn't have lost weight as quickly as I did in July and August, I might have become discouraged and went back to eating too many carbs. Having that large weight loss was very motivational though and has kept me better on track this last month or two, when I have struggled mentally with hunger. The pounds are harder to remove now and I am experiencing a lot more hunger. I don't know if that is caused by too often going to high on my carbs (leading the the "zone of misery") or if it is strictly resulting from having so much less adipose tissue to feed my energy needs.

191.4 (11am) Ate 5,204 calories yesterday

O.K. - I ate 5,204 calories HIGH CARB calories yesterday (including take out Chinese, oreo cookies, bologna sandwiches on white bread and noodle casserole. (Carbs came to 425.1 grams (estimate because of the chinese food with fried rice). The day prior to that I ate 4,295 calories (of which 299.3 carb grams were included). I should have had a weight gain of 1.62 pounds. I am up to 191.4 pounds this morning (11am) from 186.4 pounds two days ago. Obviously a lot of that is water weight, but even when I get the water weight to come back off, I should look at being 188.0 pounds again. *Heavy sigh*. I am just trying to put it all in perspective here. I obviously plan to get back to low carb and low calorie today. I just want to note that I haven't done anything I can't come back from. I KNOW I am going to struggle today though. What's funny to me is that none of what I ate yesterday was that good. It was good, but it made me feel physically really gross.

I have been here before though, many times. What matters now is how I handle today.

186.2 (9:30am) 102 BG

I tried on a old pair of Levi Silvertab Relaxed Fit jeans in size 11 this morning. I can get them on and buttoned, but they are too tight to wear. Jeeze. That's just weird. I was spot on plan yesterday, so I hoped this morning's weigh in would be a little lower, but it's amazing how my body continues to change even when the scale doesn't.

186.4 (9: 30 am) after eating pecan pie, 3 orange candy slices and 1 can of chickpeas the prior evening.

110 mg/dL this morning. That's the highest fasting BG reading I have seen in a long time. I forgot to take my Metformin last night and then also ate a bunch of junk. I had hoped I would get a better reading than that this morning. I have lost 75 pounds from my top weight 261.2. I don't think my pre-diabetes will ever improve 100% with even 120 pounds of weight loss (if I am ever able to get there). All I can do is keep doing what I know I should be doing. I am down 53 pounds since I got really serious about it on June 20th, 2013. I would still like to get down at LEAST below 165, but my end goal is really below 140 permanently. The truth of the matter is that my body will probably really start resisting any further weight loss at some point. I don't know when that will be. Formally obese people have really low leptin levels and lots of hypotrophic fat cells, which makes weight stabilization at a formally low weight very difficult. Over time (YEARS), some of the very small fat cells may die off.

185.0 (noon)

I stayed up this morning until 5am and then slept in until noon, so my weigh-in was much much later than normal. Thus the really low (to me) weight. I expect to be back up to 187-ish tomorrow. It WAS exciting to finally see 185.0 after all this time though. I certainly am feeling thinner in my clothes and I think my face is even showing more weightloss than it had been. I had 2 diet pills yesterday and even then, last night was kinda of a white knuckle night. Hopefully it will get better. =)

188.2 (9:30am)

Weight is back down. Ready to get down below 185. I just need to focus. I just had my first diet pill of the day at 11:35 am. I've also been having a cup of Celestial Seasoning Herbal Christmas tea with a tiny amount of sucralose. I think I should have had the diet pill a little closer to 11am, as I am feeling quite hungry already... but will try to let it kick in really good before having my first meal of the day.

Today is Saturday, so I have no plan for working. It rained a lot last night and it quite yucky out still, so I plan on laying in bed with my dogs and my laptop for some time.

Later that day...

So we ended up running around all day. I fixed my car (had a check engine light on that I needed to be off before going in to take emission testing). So I went out around 1 pm to look at the car and by 2pm had decided I needed to go to the auto salvage to see if they might have an impossible to buy wiring harness connector that I needed. I wolfed down 45 grams of cheese before heading out to the salvage. They had what we needed plus a sunvisor clip that was missing from my car and we stopped off at the auto store to get some electrical connectors for splicing the connector to the existing wiring. Not even 20 minutes later we had the ATI sensor hooked back up and the check engine light off! I love it when an automotive repair job goes so smoothly and actually WORKS! We then decided to go get a new oil pan and change the oil in the car before getting it emission tested, so headed in to Walmart. Then decided to go BACK to the salvage to pick up a few more odds and ends that are missing from my car (20 years old and missing a few interior switch handles and such). Then went to goodwill and got a new (to me) pair of down-hill skiing boots ($10 on sale!!) and back home. Then back out to Best Buy to get a game controller. Finally made it back home after 7 pm. So needless to say, I had missed the pill I intended to take at 3-4 pm and I was starving. I went ahead and took a diet pill while cooking my dinner (because I plan to stay up quite a while yet tonight), along with my Metformin (1000 XR), birth control pill, biotin and centrum multivitamin. I then made a stir-fry that I've been eating a lot of recently. 3.28 oz of lean steak (all fat trimmed off) stirfried (in water) with 8.22 oz zucchini, 7.20 oz fresh mushrooms, garlic powder, salt & pepper and then mixed up with 40 grams of sour cream. This is a delicious stir-fry and has lots of good nutrition. I normally make two servings when I fix it and then just refrigerate the second serving for my evening meal (which I then just heat up in the microwave). A big part of making this diet work is having a bunch of go to meals (and keeping ingredients on hand in the freezer and refrigerator) that make it simple to throw together a meal when you are STARVING and TIRED. That is where I have often failed in the last 15 years. By not always being prepared. This coming week will make five months of consistently weighing all my food and making sure to keep plenty of fresh veggies on hand along with appropriate meats, sour cream, neufchatal cheese, unsweetened almond milk, etc, etc.

So right now, I feel really satisfied and hopeful that I can get back on track 100% and get down to 165. I feel AT LEAST 10 years younger at 190 lbs than I did at 245+ lbs. I just can't wait to get even a little bit more weight off. I am really happy where I am right now weight wise, but also know that it will only get even better.

I also wanted to mention that I ate "junk" (hamburger helper hamburger rice, canned refried beans, 6 chips ahoy chocolate chip cookies) last night and I just felt gross in my stomach. I find that when I stick to on plan foods (no grains, potatoes, etc), that I just feel so much better digestion wise. I can be quite full, yet still feel good (not bloated and gross). I also want to note that when I eat on plan, I almost never ever have any gas. (Sorry TMI). But I think it is worth noting, because I think gas is a symptom of an unhappy digestive track. Eating appropriately thus leads to not having gas.

190.0

Yesterday I ate 158.3 grams carbs, so I am up in weight a little today (2,598 calories). October 15, 2013 (exactly one month ago today) I was at 191.4 lbs. I have basically stayed exactly the same for the last month. I may have lost maybe a pound or two. My average calories for the last month (October 19th, 2013 - Today November 15th, 2013 - 4 weeks in Fitday) is 1,890 calories. As I may have lost 1-2 pounds in that 4 weeks, it looks as if my daily metabolic rate is roughly 2000-2100 calories. Which is pretty much what Fitday thinks it would be. My averages for those four weeks were as follows:

Calories: 1890 kcal

Fat: 123.1 grams

Carbs: 122.3 grams - 28.1 grams fiber = 94.2 NET carbs

Protein: 93.8 grams

This was a lot of "good" planned days mixed in with a lot of crap throwing it to the wind days in which I overate a lot and may have even eaten some cookies or semi-sweet chocolate chips or a lot of carrots with blue cheese dressing. I really tried when I was having a "binge" eating sort of day to stick to low carb items, but even when you do that, your carbs can get quite high even eating stuff like carrots.

Overall, I consider this last month a success. I am quite happy to have stabilized at this weight fairly well and think my body probably needed this break. I am waffling between going quite low carb low calorie to get down to the 165-ish area (which I could do by the end of January if I really applied myself) or just trying to do this really slowly. The thing is, is it is quite horrible when you are in that "zone of torture" where you are not quite low enough calorically/carbs wise to consistently stay in ketosis. The ketosis means you inprove in accessing your body fat stores and I DO think my mitochondria are multiplying and improving their ability to access fat for fuel instead of glucose, when I stay low carb / low calorie. They HAVE to improve at it when I stay low carb / low calorie like that.

So, all of that to say that I have really been struggling to stick 100% on plan recently. I think that for the next seven days I will take 3 diet pills per day (11am, 3pm and 6pm) until I can get my body firmly back in ketosis. I hate to do that as that is $31.50 worth of diet pills, AND I have stopped going to the clinic, so what I have is what I will have to lose all the rest of this weight with. I think I have only taken about a total of 10-12 pills TOTAL so far though since I first got them back in July (??), but I really don't like using them unless I feel like it's necessary. Unfortunately, I guess I have gotten to the point where I feel like I keep struggling and hindering my own progress. I DO think it's good I've had a mini-break, but I am still right on the BMI over-weight / obese (30.0) cusp and I really need to get down further. I purchased some (used) down-hill skis this last week and plan to go skiing this winter. I would really like to get some more weight off before I go, as it makes it a lot safer and easier.

So, I am shooting for 720 (ideal) - 800 (maximum) through the end of January. That should result in at least a 25 pound weight loss. Way back in 2001 I lost from 190 down to 163 and I remember it made a HUGE difference in how I felt. So I think that even though 25 pounds doesn't sound like much, it will be worth it to really apply myself for another 2 1/2 months and then maybe try to stabilize at sub 165 for a while before I make a last run to take off the remaining 25 pounds.

188.6 (9:30am) 95 FBG (9:30am) 35.0% Body fat Per Omron 29.8 BMI

I was really pleased to get a weight of 188.6 lbs this morning, as I ate 2200 calories yesterday (all ketogenic of course). I am itching to get under 185 so bad, but I just couldn't seem to control my appetite at all yesterday. I don't know why. I guess my insulin levels are still coming down or something. Maybe I have hit the harder part of weight loss now that I am under a 30BMI (obese) and down into the "overweight" category. I need to get down to 158.0 lbs to be in the "normal" BMI range. That is a loss of 30.6 lbs. I feel like I CAN achieve that, if I focus and continue to log my food and make ketotic food choices. I can lose down to 117.0 lbs and still be in the "normal" range. Under that would be underweight for my height. I've thought it may be possible that I will have to go 125ish for some time to eliminate some of the subcutaneous fat on my stomach. (So I don't end up with a pooch on my stomach). It's possible it just will never look good though. I would love to be able to look nice in a swimsuit, but maybe that just won't ever be possible.

189.2 lbs (8:30am)

I have spent the last three weeks basically at 190. I think I got as high as 192.8 on October 23rd and have been between there (up and down and up and down) since I hit my low of 188.8 on 2/20. So I guess that means the last 17 days. I was out of ketosis there for a while as well. I wasn't eating a bunch of carbs, but I was eating too many calories that each contained carbs and they added up to be too much to remain in ketosis. I felt a lot more brain fog than I have been feeling of late as well as crazy strong food cravings that were really hard to resist, so that was interesting. My urine also changed back to the darker normal SAD pee color instead of the distinct ketogenic pee color.

I think I've been back in ketosis for about 3 days now, but have been eating around 2000 calories each day.

For the last two weeks I have averaged 1897 calories, 123.1 grams fat, 116.1-29.5 (fiber) = 86.6 NET carbs, 102.1 grams protein. These amounts basically kept my weight stable. As I am still shooting for around 50 more pounds of weight loss, I obviously need to lower my calories and carbs back to what I was doing previously. I DO think it was a good healthy break though, which probably increased my leptin levels and let me have a little mental break. It probably helped my skin catch up a little as well. I still have skin concerns with my upper thighs, stomach and breasts, but it will do what it does. I can only continue on.

Right now I am really happy to have found a method of eating that I think will work long term. I am just trying today to focus on the short term goal of keeping my carbs and calories low and striving to get under 185. I am OK with slower weight loss. I may even strive to keep it slow to aid with skin recovery.

189.8 lbs!!!! (8:30am)

Just crazy to be under 190. =)

191.0 (9:30am)

I am getting really close to the 180s!!! I have been pretty strict with myself the last 3 days because mentally I am sooo ready to be under 190.

That's a picture of the raw pumpkin seed, flax, wheat bran, protein powder, desiccated coconut, blackberry "faux" oatmeal I've been making for breakfast. YUM!

193.8 (9am)

I can wear my Gap 14R jeans now comfortably. The Levi's 555 size 15s are starting to be a tad too loose. Weight loss has slowed down a lot (I am eating more calories than I was a couple months ago), but my skin is rebounding better than I hoped in a lot of areas. I am still hoping my stomach will get better, but I am super happy so far with my progress.

This morning I made some great faux oatmeal with 10 grams golden flax meal, 10 grams raw pumpkin seeds, 13 grams low carb protein powder, 10 grams wheat bran, 10 grams unsweetened coconut and 29 grams frozen blackberries. Oh yeah, and a pinch of cinnamon and a tiny bit of liquid splenda. It was really good. I will have it again in the future.

194.4 (9am)

I continue to plug along this is the 3rd day that I have been at this weight. Once about a week ago and then also yesterday... so I think I can finally say that I am below 195. :) That feels good. When I hit 192.3 it will be a weight I haven't seen since 2002. That will be weird. So my mini focus is getting down to that. In 2001-2002 I got down to 163 from 195ish. I imagine that it will be very difficult for me to get below 163 (if I even can). I am going to try pretty hard to get pretty low though. Supposedly it might help my skin situation. If I get low enough, my skin on my stomach should get thin and lose it's excess subcutaneous fat. It has gotten better there, but it surely will never look as good as it used to. Hopefully, by getting to quite a low weight I can eliminate any of that squidgy stomach thing that some people never get beyond.

I had about 3/8 of a Gala apple last night (3.70 oz to be exact). It was so delicious. Apples are one of the biggest things I miss since eating low carb. That small amount of apple contained almost 15 grams of carbs, so there just isn't a way to normally eat them without knocking myself out of ketosis. I think they can be a partial apple sometimes food though maybe.

198.2 (8am)

The last 2 days I have eaten a little over 3 ounces of semi-sweet chocolate chips each evening. I think I may be out of ketosis? My weight is up about 1.5 lbs today. I am going to be really strict for the coming month (today is October 1st!) and see if I can't get down to 185. That would be a solid size 14. I am comfortably in my size 16 levi's (555s) today. I have been wearing them every day for over a week now. I am afraid to wash them though! So maybe not "comfortably". They will probably be a little tight for a couple hours if I wash them. My plan for the month of October is to average 720 (which is what I did for a long time in August). Same macros as usual. In fact, I am going to go back at fitday and blogger to see what exactly I was doing, as it was working quite well, and weight-loss has REALLY slowed down for me lately. (My calories have been up, even on days when I was sticking to my target macros).

197.0 9am, 97 mg/dL 10am, 1st day of period

The last few days hunger has been severely UP. Must have been increased progesterone. My breasts were really sore. Today was day #1 of my period. I seem to always get a decrease in weight on day #1. I think it's the decrease in water retention.

It is just surreal to be at 197.0. It kinda even makes me angry, because I have tried to lose weight for YEARS now. It's not as if I was just gladly getting fatter each year. I really did try to diet, but I just could never find anything that I could stick with long term (because everything left me so HUNGRY and I would just regain everything when I ultimately gave in to my hunger). My size 16 Levi's are starting to actually fit and I can comfortably wear them all day. The are still a little tighter on the stomach than I would like, but the thighs and butt area are getting to be just right. OK - maybe they are still a little tight, but they are definately wearable. =) It's just really really weird to have a normalish body again. I had gotten so used to just being really really fat. I mean, I know I am still fat, but I am normal American fat again now. I feel so much better in my own body.

199.0 (9am)

It's been a little over a week since I've posted on here. Last time (8 days ago) I was at 201.0. I am now at 199.0. I have basically lost 0.2 lbs each day since that time. No big weight swings, just gradually losing a little bit each day. I am happy with my loss. It's really quite odd to have achieved my initial goal (199.8 lbs). For so many years, just getting back under 200lbs seemed insurmountable. My new jeans are still tight, but I am wearing them this morning. It has cooled down substantially. I am even drinking my Licorice Spice Hot Tea this morning. I continue to stick to the same fat, carb and protein levels... although some days lately I have increased my caloric intake. My hair continues to shed more than I would like... but I do have reasonable thick hair, so I am not worried yet. I know that this is a normal response to the body's caloric deficit.

My new goal is 185 by Halloween (41 days from now). That is exactly 14 pounds from 199.0, so would represent a 1195 calorie deficit each day. I would have to average right at 800 calories per day to achieve 185 by then. I think it is doable, but I might not quite make it. I am comfortable with my weight loss slowing down quite a bit. It gives my skin more time to recover and isn't quite so hard on my hair.

201.0 (8:30am)

Wow. I am so close to my initial goal of 199.8. It just feels weird. I keep trying to wear the GAP 14R and Levi's 16s, but they are still too tight, so I have to keep wearing the Riders 16 jean shorts I've been wearing for a few weeks. In another 10 pounds they should be real comfortable though.

202.2 (8:30am) 96 FBG (9:30am)

I went to the diet doctor yesterday. I weighed on their scale 204.4 (with my clothes on of course, so heavier than my home scale). Body fat was at 38.5%. They couldn't praise me enough. I have lost quite a bit more weight than their average diet pill customer. What's so funny is how few of them I have taken. I DO think they are a very valuable tool to have though. Anything that helps you from "breaking your diet", can be worth a lot. I have fallen off many, many diets, by losing control and then not being able to get back on track the next day, which ultimately led to going back to my regular way of eating.

I was really happy to see 202.2 this morning (at 8:30 even!). Only 2.4 lbs left to go until I am under 200 lbs. That seems kinda unbelievable. I have worked at this really hard though for the last 82 days, so I guess it should work, when you do everything right. I have just tried for so many years to lose weight, that it still seems odd that it is actually happening.

203.8 (11:30am)

I have been at this weight for a while now. I am hoping the next few days show a decline. Tomorrow is one month from my last diet doctor appointment. I haven't taken a pill in a couple weeks (I think I've taken 5 or 6 total), but I think I will go ahead and call in tomorrow for an appointment. I have struggled the last few days.

I am down 35.4 since June 20th. It's been 11 weeks 3 days since I started my diet. I have averaged 3.09 lbs per week, but of course it was much faster in the beginning and has slowed down considerably as my daily caloric needs have reduced (with the decreased weight). I have been having a harder time staying at the really low 720ish calories that I strive for each day. Yesterday I ended up at 899 calories and the day before that at 1525 calories. I HAVE managed to stay low carb though this whole entire time and I am very proud of that. I really don't mind if my calories go higher, as that just slows down the weight loss. However, if I were to go high carb in my food choices, I might slip off of my diet entirely (past experience has shown me this time and again).

My arms have slimmed down considerably. I can't get over it, when I look at them in the mirror. I am worried about extra skin on my arms, upper thighs and stomach. Hopefully my oily skin will benefit me for once and help my skin recover. My wedding ring is very very very loose. I can fit it on my middle finger now. It is crazy tight on my middle finger, but I can get it all the way on. Weird.

206.4 (7:45am)

Weight is up this morning after eating 14 grams of chicken bouillon last night (prepared as a soup with xantham gum) and also weighing much earlier than normal. No worries. I heard my stomach growling last night a lot while I was lying in bed, which means I was good yesterday.

We went to the thrift stores last night and I got two pairs of jeans. A pair of Levi 555's size 15 (!!!!) and a pair of GAP size 14Regular. The both went on and buttoned, but were tight. I should be able to fit them comfortably by the end of this month, I think. I just cant believe that I can put on those pants and even button them. I tried on a bunch of shirts as well. Large and X-large. I was going to get them, but then remembered how many shirts I have in storage. I will have to have my husband help me get them soon. It was just really surreal to try things on and be so much smaller. I pretty much look like a normal size American to myself in the mirror now. The last set of pictures my husband took of me (at 209.8), didn't reflect near the weight loss I've been seeing in the mirror each day now, so I will be curious to see how my 199.8 pictures will look when I get there.

I think I will go to the doctor and get some more phendimetrazine on Monday. I will call today and try to get an appointment. I haven't taken but like 5 or so of the pills, but I want to have plenty on hand for the coming 6 months or whatever, and I think he is supposed to cut me off soon. Maybe he won't though if I continue to show good losses? Not sure how that is supposed to work. They never have said.

204.0 (10:45am) 92 FBG (8am)

Under 205!! Now only 4.2 lbs to 199.8. I have had that as a goal for September 20th for a long time now on Fitday. I am not sure it can happen in 16 days, but it would be awesome if it did. =) No worries. I am just sticking to plan and counting on that to work eventually.

205.2 (9:30am) 100 mg/dL

205.2 (11am)

Each day, I get more and more accustomed to being in a "normal" body again. It's kind of odd to me now that I couldn't get low carb to work for me before. It's not as if I was ever OK with being obese. I tried day after day to lose weight. I am not sure what is so different this time. Perhaps just severally restricting my calories was enough to massively cut down on the amount of insulin my body was pumping out. I have also become accustomed to being hungry most of the time. I remember that feeling from when I was 18 years old and went from 190ish down to 140. I was just hungry all the time, but became mentally OK with that feeling.

206.4 (9:45am)

It's now Friday evening. I am supposed to go to my mom and dad's tomorrow morning and stay for the day or maybe even two. I have been successful for so long now, that I am just kinda used to it now. I don't fear the terror that I normally feel when facing this sort of a "situation" while in the midst of a "diet". I really plan to continue to eat low carb tomorrow and weigh and measure whatever food I eat. My mom has a digital scale that I can use to weigh and measure my foods, so I plan to keep on track as well as I can. I don't think I will be able to pre-plan my macro-nutrients like I normally do, but I think I can do pretty well. I don't want to be overconfident though and will try to watch out for that.

I have been able to start wearing some size 16s again... which has been super, super exciting. I almost for a while there, didn't even feel like it would be possible to get back into 16s. Now I feel like I should be able to at least get back into 12s, if not into 10s. I am not to worried anymre about getting there as quickly as possible... I think if I get there slowly, I should end up with better skin recovery. (At least I hope so!)

206.8 (11am)

It feels kinda surreal to be within 7 pounds of my initial goal of getting back to 199.8 (under 200 lbs!!!!). My projected date is still around September 20th. My calories have gone up slightly (I have had 3 higher calorie, yet still only low carb items days since starting on June 20th). My average is now 797.2 calories per day since June 20th. The three higher calorie days were each around 1800 if I remember correctly. Some 16's are now fitting me! I "almost" feel as if I am regular American chubby again (rather than "obese" looking). It's super exciting to just be feeling so much better in my skin and in my clothes.

209.2 (9:45am) Woohoo!!! 95 FBG

210.8 (8:45) 95FBG

210.6 (9:15am) 100 FBG

211.0 (9:00 am)

212.0 (7:15am) 95 FBG (7:15am)

211.6 (8:45am) 104 FBG

213.4 (7am) 76 FBG @ 9am after doing a bunch of manual work

That 76 FBG is the lowest I have ever seen by far. Weird. I didn't think exercise would affect it that much.

212.8 (9am)

213.4 (9:30am) 103 FBG

214.6 (11am) 94 FBG

This is my second day at this weight. I feel way skinnier than I used to. I probably don't look way skinnier... but it is super exciting to feel so much better in my own body. I struggled last night and took a pill around 7pm. That makes either the 4th or 5th pill I've taken since getting them. I went in for a refill the other day, so I have around 145 left I think. I think I will go in again this next month and get another refill. I need enough to get down to my goal weight. I notice that I seem to struggle more on days where I have reached a new low weight.

215.2 (8:15am) 97 mg/dL FBG

215.6 (8:15am)

216.8 (8:30am)

Pre-dinner blood sugar 88. =)

216.6 (9:45am) 99 FBG

217.2 (9:15am) 110 FBG

217.8 (9am) 98FBG

218.4 (11am) FBG 101 mg/dL

I ended up eating 1771 calories yesterday (120g F, 63.5 - 17.5=46g Net C, 120 g Protein yesterday). I was super excited to see this weight this morning. I expected to even possibly be over 220, so that means I am well on my way to getting under 215, if I just keep focused. Once I get under 216, I will be lower than I have been in like 7 years? So that will be super exciting. I am still really trying to only focus on the 5 pound increments. It seems to be a lot better for me mentally. Also, what is interesting, is you really can tell when you've lost five pounds. You can feel it in your clothes and when you move around.

218.2 (9:30am)

Finally, I feel like I am on a downward trend again. =)

Today marks Period Day 1, so maybe it was just high progesterone levels that were keeping me higher.

219.0 (9:30am)

Two successes this morning. Weight 219.0. Fasting blood glucose 98 mg/dL. =)

I have never seen my fasting blood sugar that low since I started testing it. That means my low carb diet is starting to do good things to not only my weight my my morning gluconeogenesis. =)

220.2 (9:00am) UGGGGGHHHHH!

OK. Average calories over the last 7 days = 1070 (With the one high day included in there... all the other days were 700-750ish). I DID move to my placebo birth control pills 2 days ago, so maybe it's hormonal water weight retention? I just am not sure. I don't know what to do except keep doing what I should be doing, I guess.

Fasting blood sugar this morning was 102 mg/dL. That is the lowest I've seen (fasting) in a really long time, so I will take it that I am doing something right. I just have to persevere.

I month ago today I was at 228.4. I guess that's were my frustration is coming from. That's only 8.2 pounds down in one month, despite being very very good. I do understand that I release a lot of insulin for any carbohydrate (and for protein or food volume as well). That just makes it that much harder. I am also kinda frustrated that my stomach fat hasn't gone down more than it has. I can see the weight loss a lot in my face, neck, legs, arms and boobs... but my stomach, although it has reduced a lot, still has a long way to go.

219.8 (9:30am)

Calories yesterday: 2256

Fat grams: 152.8

Carbs: 99.9-29.6 fiber = 70.3 NET carbs

Protein: 136.1 grams

This was the highest that I have eaten in over 5 weeks. Everything was low carb, but the carbs still ended up being high because of the large amount of food. I felt the fullest I have felt in a very long time. I didn't feel guilty about it either. I needed a small break I think. I have really struggled over the last week to week and a half. Not losing much weight... I'd been keeping my calories right around 720 each day and not seeing any results.

It made me feel good that after eating so much yesterday, this morning my "high" (full) weight was 219.8. I've made a lot of progress. =)

I am ready to get back down to 700ish a day (low carb) and try to get under 215 now. (I am really focused on getting under 200, but am trying to only focus on the 5 lb increments).

Lunch (12:30pm): 11.5 oz green cabbage sauteed with 6 (beef) lil' smokies (50 grams worth): 191 calories, 15.3 grams fat, 6.3 grams carb, 8.1 grams protein

1 1/2 hours PP blood sugar: 120 mg/dL - higher than I expected to see. I'm still seeing fasting numbers in the 107-110 mg/dL area. I had hoped that I would be seeing lower numbers by now. I am still on the 1000 mg SR metformin each day (taken in the evening).

219.2 (9am)

I got about 10 different weight this morning on my scale, but got 219.2 a bunch of times in a row, so I think it is true. I don't know why my scale does this some days. I really felt like I was lighter than this before I weighed, and saw as low as 218.2, so wonder if that wasn't correct. I normally know what I will weight before I get on the scale, just by telling how my body feels. I really felt like I was lighter than 219.2, but I don't suppose t matters. I just have to stay on plan and it will work itself out eventually. I definitely am looking thinner all the time, despite the slow movement of the scale during the last 2-3 weeks.

220.2 (9:30am)

fasting blood sugar 106 (9:30 am - 1/2 hour after getting up). I ate 1302 calories yesterday. 69.6 grams fat, 75.5-21.1=54.4 grams NET carbs, 102.4 grams protein. I made homemade soup with a ton of veggies and ate about half the pot. Earlier in the day I ate shiritaki noodles with cheese, sour cream and 45 grams of frozen peas. I also ate a strawberry protein shake (make with almond milk), cheddar cheese, and a sugar free popsicle. The day ended up being about 2X what I have been eating for the last 5 weeks. In all everything (calories, fat, carbs, protein). My weight is up 0.4 pounds today. I probably would have finally saw a loss this morning if I wouldn't have had all that soup and cheese last night. I am OK with it though. I HOPE I didn't kick myself out of ketosis. I plan on only eating heavy cream, steak and cheddar cheese today. I think I will take a phendimetrazine if my cravings get bad. (I only ever took the one still from when I got them so long ago).

219.8 (10am)

Ok. It was 219.8 AGAIN. I don't even know how that's even possible when your eating ~700 calories a day. *sigh*. My clothes seem to be fitting better and better though, so I'll just keep on keeping on.

219.8 AGAIN! (9ish am)

I think this is my 4th day in a row at 219.8. I have been perfect... so not sure what is going on. All I can do is keep doing a good diet and hope that it goes down one of these days. Frustrating though!

219.8 (10am)

219.8 (11am)

220.4 (11:15am)

221.0 (8am)

Today marks exactly 1 month (from June 20th) that I have been 100% on plan. I am super happy with how I've done. I am down 18.2 lbs since that time. (I was 239.2 lbs on June 20th). That was my decarbed debloated weight too. I have averaged 650.1 calories per day during that month's time. I have swam 2X and walked 4X I think.

Fitday is showing me the June 23rd - July 20th (the last 4 weeks) as the following averages:

666 calories

43.5 grams fat per day

27.3 (gross carbs) - 7.9 grams fiber = 19.4 grams NET carbs per day

44.1 grams Protein per day

57%fat / 16% carbohydrate / 27% protein

Supposedly (per fitday) I am burning 2531 calories per day now (sedentary, 38, F, 221.0 lbs). That seems to be fairly accurate with the losses I've shown during the last month. I have felt pretty good this whole month. I definately felt better once I was strongly in ketosis. (After the first 2 weeks I started feeling a lot better). This is basically a HCG level diet with the additional fat I make sure to have in 1 meal (to ensure gall bladder daily flushing, eat at least 10 grams fat in 1 meal). Beyond that one meal, I try to keep my food for the day low fat. Net carbs I try to keep at 20-30 max). Protein just kinda ends up where it ends up. My thoughts are that I should try to get at least 40 grams per day and then if I desire more (if meat sounds appealing, then I should strive to get even more). I'm trying to listen to my body in regards to protein intake. There are such differing opinions about what protein requirements are. I am going with minimum requirements and then trying to listen to my body. I think if I can get my hormones in line (through low carb eating), my body should hopefully signal me correctly in regards to protein intake requirements.

Fasting blood sugar this morning (after being up about 2 1/2 hours) 118. I was pretty dissappointed to see that high of a number considering how great I've been with my eating, my minimal newly started exercise and my continued use of 1000 SR Metformin each day. All I can do is keep on doing what I've been doing.

I also wanted to note that I have only ever taken that 1 phendimetrazine since going to the diet doctor last month. Staying in ketosis has controlled my appetite to the extent that even though I have had a few evening where I mentally struggle, I have not had to take any more pills to keep on the diet. They DO continue to reassure me that I have then and they even seem to motivate me to stay on my low carb diet, because I know if I slip up, I'm going to be fighting my hunger again. I haven't decided if I will get a refill or not when August 8th rolls around. My guess is that I should. I know that as I get lower on the scale, I am going to increasingly struggle with hunger (as my leptin levels decrease and my fat cells become increasingly hypotrophic). It would be good to have a decent quantity in reserve for when that time comes. At $89.00 for 60 pills, they are right at $1.50 per pill. They are expensive (for me, as we are on a tight income), but loosing this weight is sooo important. I don't want to have to go through the hassle of starting at the clinic again either and taking the blood tests etc.

222.2 (8am)

Nothing really happened that would put my weight up. I am just going through those natural fluctuations I guess. I am really struggling to get under 220. I remember saying that about 225 though... so just have to remember that losing weight is hard. To expect it to be otherwise is foolish. We went walking again this morning. We have been sticking to the every other day exercise commitment so far... so that's good. =)

221.2 (9am)

I'm really having to fight my way to get under 220. But it will happen. There's this funny thing that happens after I've been successfully dieting for around a month. I start to get this peace about when I will have lost weight by. Normally I spend a lot of time thinking about being under X weight by Y time. But I get this attitude of thinking that it doesn't matter. That it will happen and the days will come whether I am heavier or lighter.

222.0 (8:15am)

222.4 (8:15am)

221.6 (10am)

I was happy to see that weight this morning.

222.8 (9am)

New low. I went to my parents yesterday and was able to stay on track. =) They also noticed my weight loss, so that was nice. My husband and I went walking again this morning. We are trying to commit to exercise every other day. I didn't want to commit to it every day and then fail, so this seemed a better way to start off.

224.0 (8am)

We went and walked around the pond this morning. It was really nice out.

223.6 (12:15)

224.4 (10am)

I wanted to note, I got my ReliOn A1C test results back as a 5.6. That was about what I thought it might be. Hopefully I can someday get it lower when my weight comes off a bit more and I stick to low carb.

224.6 (10:15am)

FINALLY under 225. Man, that was rough. All you can do is keep doing what your doing and eventually it has to come down, but it sure is dissappointing when it takes so long to do so.

226.2 (10am)

Ugh. Not sure why I am still up. Boo!!!!!

I am going in to the diet doctor at noon. I am curious to see what their body fat analyzer says.

Ok. It is later. Last time it measured me at 44.1% body fat and this time at 42.1% body fat.

226.6 (11:30am)

My weight increase of 0.8 lbs today is due to have chicken vegetable soup yesterday (2X). I made homemade chicken broth and then added cut up chicken breast, celery, carrot, onion and cabbage. I salted the heck out of it and I think that accounts for my weight gain. I don't think it was any sort of really weight gain, just water retention. But as I am trying desperately to get under 225, I guess I won't make any more for today even though I made up a ton more chicken broth. (I added the chicken and veggies to the broth after cooking up the broth, so i would get measurements of all of it). Tomorrow I have an appointment at the diet doctor to refill my prescription (even though I still have only taken 1 of the pills I got last time I went). I want to show a great improvement when they weigh me in.

My face / double chin / fat neck situation is really improving, so that's nice. I put on my one piece bathing suit yesterday so I could get a look at the situation. I feel like the back fat is a lot better than the last time I wore it. I am somewhat concerned that my stomach will never be what I would like it to be again. I don't have a ton of stretch marks on it though, so maybe it will bounce back better than I'm thinking.

FBG 107 (45 minutes after getting up, or 12:15 noon to be more accurate (I went to bed at 5am)).

225.8 (11:00am)

I want so bad to get under 225, but I think I've been getting there so slowly, that by the time it happens, it will probably be somewhat of a letdown. Yesterday I looked at fat pictures and food logs/ diet journals covering the last TEN years. It was kinda sad. It breaks my heart that I have spent so many years of my life trying to lose weight. So much energy and thought into something that other people don't even really think about.

226.2 (11:15am)

Slowly but surely.

Measurements:

Fullest part of chest: 47 1/4"

Smallest part of waist: 41"

Waist measurement over belly button: 47 1/2"

Fullest part of butt: 47 1/8"

Fullest part of right thigh: 26 1/4"

Fullest part of right bicept: 14 3/4"

Neck: 15 15/16" (I have a big neck and it is actually one of the body parts I most look forward to shrinking in size)

227.0 (9:45am)

Slowly. Slowly.

227.4 (10:30am)

We went to the park this morning to throw the ball around. I think it was already in the upper 80s when we got there. This heat wave is supposed to end tomorrow. I pray that is the case. I noticed when I was walking up the post office stairs with my box of packages this morning that it is definately easier for me to climb all those stairs with a tub of packages than it used to be. Weight loss is so gradual that it is easy to not notice the changes. I also have a pair of khaki shorts that I used to sssssqueeze into and have a crazy muffin top, or I would even wear with them unbuttoned that now fit great with even some room to spare. I am just focusing on getting under 225 right now. My weight is continuing to come down slowly, but I think I will have to fight to get rid of each one of these pounds in the 220s. I made an appointment for next Monday to go in and get a month's worth of diphenhydramine. I have only taken 1 pill so far (I've had them for 12 days so far), but they make me feel a lot more like I have an option of last resort, so I would like to have the pills on hand in case I later need them. I think that if I stick to the timing and intakes I have been having for the last couple of weeks though, my hunger is managable and my cravings aren't too bad most days.

228.2 (9am)

I saw about 7 different weights on my scale this morning, so I am just going to say I stayed the same and call it good. =)

228.2 lbs (10am)

My guess is that I am going to have to fight really hard to get under 225.

228.4 (9:00am)

I am focusing on getting below 225 now and imagine it will take a while now. 3.4 lbs doesn't sound like a lot, but I'm getting close to TOM, so progesterone should be increasing and along with it water weight and hunger levels.

228.8 (10:15am)

Looking good for today too! =)

229.2 (10:15am)

I got a sunburn yesterday, so REALLY was expecting to be up today instead of under 230. So yay!!!! Super exciting. I haven't been this "low" of a weight in a looooong time. I stuck in the 220's solidly while working at my job before last... so that would be from 2003-2005 I think. I'm hoping it will start showing by the time I get into the 2teens.

230.0 (10:15am)

Wow. Just wow. It has been sooooo long since I saw 230.0 on the scale. I can't wrap my head around it. I really expected to be up a bit this morning just because I couldn't imagine my body hitting 230.X this morning. It really is helping me stay motivated, to see the scale keep moving down. My stomach and legs and arm and chest all looks noticibly smaller (to me).

I really struggled last night. I didn't want to have to take a pill, so I didn't, but I struggled ALL night long. So proud of myself for not giving in. =)

231.0 (10am)

Wow. That was a wonderful surprise to see 231.0 on the scale this morning. I have been so good about staying on track, but it is always still surreal when dieting works.

232.8 (11:30am)

I am up a tiny bit despite only consuming 700ish calories yesterday. I drank almost an entire 2-liter of sprite zero, so I guess it's to be expected. I seem able to lose weight a lot better, just sticking to a lot of water. I have been carrying around a 1.5 liter bottle that I refill a couple times a day. My allergies have still been bothering me. Today is Tuesday and I still have only taken the one phendimetrazine since getting them last Friday. I am trying to take them only when I need to. I went in and had blood taken yesterday for my labwork. I will be curious to see what my numbers are.

232.6 (10am)

233.2 (noon)

Wow. I was super excited to finally break through the 235 barrier. Now to get under 230. I am just trying to remember to focus on the five pound increments this time and not get ahead of myself. I REALLY struggled last night. I took the first one of my phendimetrazine tablets around 8pm, (because I knew I was starting to struggle and picture going out to eat in my head). At 9pm DH and I went to the grocery store and I stocked up on veggies, some strawberries, almond milk and diet soda. After I got home, I made a carrot and daikon radish "pickle" with splenda and vinegar mixture that is often used on bahn mi sandwiches. Then we went to bed and I lay in bed for 2 hours without being about to go to sleep. At 2-3am I got back up and played on the internet for 2-3 hours. I went back to bed a little after 5am. I am really struggling lately to get back on a "normal" schedule. It is driving my husband nuts, I'm sure.

235.8 (noon)

236.2 (10am)

Finally back down to 236.2. Ready to get below 235. I am going to the doctor today to get on phendimetrazine. I was on it about 6 years ago and it really helped me lose weight at that time. (This is back when I went from 240 down to 193). It really increases energy. I briefly was on phentermine (the more common diet pill prescription) at that time, but suffered horrible headaches with it. I plan to only use it when feeling incredibly weak willed. I hope to not use it every day. (I used it that way last time). With each dose you take, you because more desensitized to the medication, so you only have a short window in which to use it and get it's benefits. I am hoping that with the 5+ years that have passed since last using it, I will get the original effect from it.

240.8 (11:20am)

(11:45am): Coffee with 51 grams heavy cream, Ez-Sweetz and almond extract

240.8 (2:15pm)

235.8 (10am) FINALLY under 236 again...

So... I haven't been writing anything lately other than my morning weigh in. Since late February I've been on then off then on then off... again and again. Today marks 8 days that I have been dieting again. I've lowered my calorie intake this time. I am shooting for 50-70 carbs, one meal that has at least 15 grams fat (to promote gall bladder emptying) and then low carb veggies to fill it out (make it more satisfying) and get more nutrition in. What's been odd is that I have averaged 661 calories per day (for the last 8 days). Each day has been right around there (no days significantly higher or lower). What's odd about it, is that I think I am experiencing a lot less hunger (mental/physical struggle) eating at this lower calorie level. I think my insulin levels are just that little bit smaller that it is making it a lot easier. (It's also possible that I am at a good point in my monthly hormonal cycle and it is just easier because of that... it's far too early to make any definitive statements). Anyway, I am going to keep on with what I've been doing for as long as I can and see if it holds true.

I've been starting each day with either coffee or avocado around noon, then a salad with low carb veggies, lean meat with what comes to about 20 grams of protein (nutritionally, not by weight), and then a salad dressing I make with Smart Beat mayonaisse, vinegar, liquid splenda, garlic powder, pepper (and then sometimes either basil, or mustard or even dill added to change it up). Then for dinner I've been having around another piece of lean meat that has around 20 grams protein (nutritionally, not by weight) with some veggies to again fill out the meal and make it interesting.

Of note: I am eating leaner meat for meal #2 & #3 and my physical intake (meaning the amount of space the food occupies in my stomach) seems to be less than in the past. I am working really hard to make sure that I don't eat my meal #2 until after 3pm and meal #3 until after 6pm. Evening is the hard time of day for me, so it is really important not to eat too early in the evening and then struggle all night as a consequence.

236.4 (9:45am)

237.4

237.8

Still 1.8 lbs up from where I was clear back on March 23rd. I have spent the last 2 1/2 months going up and down and up and down. I try to remind myself that I am 23 pounds down from my highest (1 1/2 years ago) and to just keep at it. It sucks that I can put so much effort into basically maintaining though. Any "time off" just makes me gain back everything I work so hard to lose.

238.4

238.4 (11:30am)

245.6

244.6 (11:15am - following 2 days of stuffing my gullet with carbs)

240.8 (9am)

I ate a glazed donut (my husband's) and a couple cups of skim milk last night. Bad girl! I am up a bit as a result. Today, I will probably also suffer some cravings as a result. Today is my last day of antibiotics for my throat. My period arrived yesterday or the day before (2 weeks early).

239.0 (9am)

241.6 (9am)

Breakfast (11am): Coffee with 40 grams heavy cream, 8 drops EZ-Sweetz and 7 drops almond extract

Lunch: Can of green beans mixed with a cut up cucumber, 1.62 oz sour cream, dill, garlic powder and pepper

Snack (5:15pm): 4 oz baked ham (lean only eaten).

243.2 (9:45am)

I was pretty restrained. I had coffee with cream (41g). Made a salad out of cooked bacon, canned green beans, raw cabbage, sour cream, pepper, garlic powder and rice vinegar. Later I had some non-fat cottage cheese and some more cooked bacon. I weighed and measured everything on my digital scale and input it into fitday.

Daily totals:

1262 calories, 87.6 grams fat, 29.8 grams - 8.6 = 21.2 grams NET carbs, 88.0 grams protein

62%f, 9%c, 29%p

I started a Z-pack for my sore throat that I have had for over a month. I hope it kicks it.

244.4 (10:30am)

245.0 (9:30am)

I ate spaghetti and garlic bread last night. Oh yeah, and peanut M&M's. I haven't had a successful low carb day in 2 weeks?

245.4 (10:45am)

O.K. - I've been eating carby crap for the last week? My knees are making horrible cracking sounds when I go to sit down. Obviously I NEED to get some of this weight off. I am doing damage to my knees.

Breakfast (11:15am) - Coffee with 40 grams heavy cream, 8 drops of EZ-Sweetz and a capful of almond extract.

245.2 (10am - full of carb bloat)

245.8

244.2 (10:30am)

243.4 (11am)

My weight is up after eating a bunch of carby junk last night. *sigh*. I really understand NOW though, that I fail not when I fall of plan, but when I don't get back on plan at the next meal, next day or whatever. It's when I let that one indiscretion turn into weeks or months or YEARS of being off plan and not caring about my weight, that I fail. So here I am now, today caring and being LCHF. I think if I can keep this mindset in place, I can succeed, where I have always failed before. I will never succeed if I can't figure out how to keep on keepin' on even when I eat something I shouldn't.

Lunch (4pm): Light Flatout Wrap with 30 grams mayo, 68 grams sour cream, 35 grams green onions, 42 grams cheddar, garlic powder and pepper.

Dinner (7pm): 4.48 oz (raw weight) 73/27 ground beef cooked (not drained), then mixed with 67 grams cream cheese, 90 grams sour cream, 24 grams green onions, garlic powder and pepper. Eaten with 31 grams pork rinds.

I forgot to take a picture of my dinner.

Daily totals:

1637 calories, 142.3 grams fat, 32.2-10.5 grams fiber = 21.7 grams NET carbs, 66.5 grams protein

76%f, 7%c, 17%p

242.4 (9am)

Calories were a little higher than I would have liked as well as carbs yesterday. I thought I still might get a little loss, so was kinda disappointed to be up as much as I was. Oh well.

Lunch: 1.45 oz (raw weight) bacon, 16 oz bag mixed low carbish oriental veggies, one natural casing hot dog

Dinner (6:30pm): 6.00 oz iceberg lettuce, 0.63 oz green onions, 2 hard boiled eggs, 1 large carrot (forgot to weigh), 75 grams cheddar cheese, 73 grams blue cheese dressing

Evening: I lost control and ate a bunch of Milk Duds, Jelly Bellies, spaghetti with meat sauce, 2 hamburger buns with margarine. YUCK. I don't really know what prompted all that.

241.4 (9:30am)

Yesterday was Mother's Day. We went out of town to go see my mom and dad. Lunch and dinner are approximations calorically, but probably really close. My weight yesterday morning was 241.6.

Lunch (1pm): 12 oz (raw weight - weighed on scale) New York Strip Steak. (grilled on charcoal grill). Served with salad (bagged iceberg, carrot blend) mixed with fresh tomatoes (not a lot). Salad was dressed with a homemade dressing I made with "salad dressing" (ie Miracle Whip type dressing), about a tbsp (or less) of olive oil, white vinegar (splash), garlic powder and a few grinds of black pepper. Then for dessert I had 6 fresh strawberries sliced up. (Everyone else had chocolate cake).

Dinner (7pm): Hot dog in natural casing (the good expensive ones), served on a Light Flatout Wrap with mayo (around 45 grams probably, but again, not measured) and about 5-6 dill pickle slices.

Yesterday's Daily total estimation:

1790 calories, 145 grams fat, 34 grams carb - 12 grams fiber = about 22 NET carbs, 92 grams protein

71%f, 7%c, 22%p

It was a really high protein day for me. I was SOOOOO proud of myself for sticking to LCHF despite eating Chinese buffet the night before and going out of town. I really came very close last night while lying in bed to having candy. I had the package in my hand and everything. But I reminded myself that I probably would end my diet right then and there if I had any, so I gave them to my husband.

Today:

Lunch (2pm): Light Flatout Wrap with 25 grams mayo, natural casing hotdog, 6 dill pickle slices, 27 grams chopped tomato, 0.42 oz sliced green onion

Snack: 20 grams butter cooked with 11.57 oz cabbage

Dinner: Salad made with 6.1 oz iceberg lettuce, 2 large green onions, 2 boiled eggs, 1.31 oz cooked weight bacon, 30 grams cheddar cheese, 44 grams blue cheese dressing

Snack: light flatout wrap, natural casing hotdog, 25 grams mayo, 0.43 oz green onions, 6 dill pickle slices

Daily total:

2,046 calories, 166.6 grams fat, 79.5 grams - 31.2 grams fiber = 48.3 grams NET carbs, 79.8 grams protein

70%f, 14%c, 15%p

239.0 (9:30am)

I am happy to get back below 240. Now to get below 235.

Lunch (1pm): salad with dressing. Dressing made with 48 grams mayo, 1.98 oz sour cream, 6 drops EZ-Sweetz, rice vinegar, garlic powder and pepper. Salad was made of 9.59 oz lettuce, 2.68 oz tomato, 1.48 oz frozen peas, 1.27 oz green onions, 2.79 grated carrot, 1.69 oz cooked bacon pieces and 1 large boiled egg.

Snack: (4pm): 67 grams of peanut butter

Dinner (8:30pm): We went to our favorite Chinese Buffet. I ate a lot. Fried spring rolls, sweet and sour meats, green beans, mushrooms, Chinese noodles, fried won-tons. I would estimate I ate around 2000 calories there. It was a lot but not enough to make me feel gross afterwards. (I didn't have heartburn that night or feel really stuffed). But - I was definitely FULL.

Later, I had a King size Reeses, some Jelly Belly Beans and some Milk Duds. I made sure to quit eating junk by midnight and said "no more". I would like to occasionally be able to eat off plan like this and be able to get right back on plan and have it be not a big deal. I am working towards that goal. I don't know if it's possible for me to abstain 100% without ultimately falling off plan for months and months.

240.8

Up some today. Not sure why, but I suppose it really doesn't matter. Normal body fluctuations, I'm sure.

Breakfast (2:30pm): 84 grams melted jalapeno cheese with a 32 oz diet coke

Dinner (8:45pm): 16 oz Bag of frozen oriental mixed vegetables (broccoli, snow peas, water chestnuts, green beans, red peppers, carrots & onions) cooked with 4.62 oz (raw weight) bacon (fat was NOT drained from pan before adding the vegetables). This was surprisingly good and had good final nutrition ratios. I will definitely eat this again sometime.

Daily totals:

1051 calories, 84.5 grams fat, 34.3 grams - 11.4 grams fiber = 22.9 grams NET carbs, 45.2 grams protein

72%f, 12%c, 16%p

Lastly, I just wanted to make note that my stomach bothered me for most of the day after eating the cheese this afternoon. I don't normally consider myself dairy sensitive at all, but as I hadn't eaten anything else (besides the diet soda), I want to note it and keep an eye out after eating cheese in the future. (See if this is a reoccurring theme).

240.0 (11:45am)

Yesterday ended up being really low in both protein and calories. I will attempt to up my protein intake today.

Lunch (2:15pm): 9.91 oz California Avocado (this was 3 medium size ones), 0.88 oz white onion, lemon juice, salt, 3.99 oz iceberg lettuce

Dinner (5ish): 2 hot dogs in natural casings with a sauce made with 27 grams mayo, 1.27 oz sour cream, horseradish (refrigerated grated 100% horseradish), salt and pepper

Daily Totals:

1302 calories, 120.1 grams fat, 38.8 grams - 20.6 grams fiber = 18.2 grams NET carbs, 27.0 grams protein

81%f, 11%c, 8%p

240.8 (11:30am)

Weight has been steadily coming down. I imagine I might struggle at this weight for a while now if past experience has shown me anything about what to expect.

Breakfast (4pm): Coffee with 50 grams heavy cream and 9 drops EZ-Sweetz

Dinner (8pm): 4.45 oz (raw weight) bacon cooked with 16.33 oz green cabbage

Daily totals:

866 calories, 75.8 grams fat, 29.1 grams - 11.6 grams fiber = 17.5 grams NET carbs, 21.6 grams protein

79%f, 12%c, 9%p

242.2 (10am)

Breakfast (10am): coffee with 50 grams heavy cream, 8 drops EZ-Sweetz, 3 drops almond extract

Lunch (2pm): 7.41 oz California avocado, 0.99 oz chopped white onion, 2.26 oz chopped Roma tomato, 1 capfull lemon juice (from bottle) and salt.

Dinner: 5.89 oz (raw weight) ground beef, 10.51 oz cabbage, 1.90 oz sour cream, salt and pepper

Snack (8:30pm): 3.88 oz iceberg lettuce, 59 grams cheddar cheese, 34 grams blue cheese dressing

Daily totals:

1685 calories, 147.4 grams fat, 52.4 grams - 24.0 grams fiber = 28.4 grams NET carbs, 50.3 grams protein

77%f, 11%c, 12%p

243.2 (9:45am)

Breakfast (11:30am): coffee with 50 grams heavy cream and 8 drops EZ-Sweetz

Lunch (1:30pm): 4.66 (cooked weight) ground pork, 6.28 oz zucchini julienned, 4.06 oz mushrooms, 1.73 oz sour cream, Worcestershire sauce, pepper, onion powder, paprika and salt

Snack (6:45pm): 5.08 oz California Avocado

Daily totals:

970 calories, 79.3 grams fat, 25.2 grams - 12.9 = 12.3 grams NET carbs, 47.4 grams protein

71%f, 9%c, 19%p

244.6 (10am)

Breakfast (1pm): 3.28 oz California avocado

Snack: 109 g cheese

Snack: 49 g cashews

Dinner (5:45pm): Light Flatout Wrap with 26 g mayo and 46 g cheese

Daily totals:

1272 calories, 104.6 grams fat, 47.7 grams - 16.9 = 30.8 grams NET carbs, 51.8 grams protein

69%f, 14%c, 16%p

245.0 (11am)

I at the other half of the mushroom, chicken, cream cheese, etc concoction I made yesterday. Half of it around 2pm and the other half around 3pm.

Snack (11pm): 42 grams jalapeno cheese

Daily totals:

1447 calories, 97.2 grams fat, 45.2 - 10.0 grams fiber = 35.2 grams NET carbs, 102.0 grams protein

59%f, 12%c, 29%p

Today was a really high protein day. I can probably go pretty low on the protein tomorrow if I want.

243.6 (11am)

Last night was really hard. My husband said at 9pm or so that he wanted pizza or mcdonalds or something. I said ok. I was going to have some too. It turned out Pizza Hut closes at 9:30 or something, so he didn't have time to have it. We went back and forth. He didn't want to be responsible for knocking me off track. I wanted to eat a bunch of food (after talking about it, it got my motor running). We ended up leaving for mcdonalds and luckily, I managed to talk myself out of getting any. We got his food and went home. He ate it in his office and I had a bunch of diet mountain dew in my office. I was really close to losing it. *sigh* I hope this gets easier. I am glad that I have upped the calories though. Perhaps it will make it easier on evenings like that, to make the right choice.

Ok. Last night I threw in the crockpot 22.79 oz boneless skinless chicken breast tenderloins and 9.21 oz mushrooms (plus a little water, salt and pepper). This morning I added in another 6.14 oz mushrooms, 7.69 oz cream cheese, 1.80 oz green onions, 12.95 oz sour cream and 11.99 oz frozen green peas. After it was done cooking I split it into 2 portions (one for today and one for tomorrow). I then ate half of today's portion around noon and the other half around 4 or 5 pm. It was really good. I think I will make it (or something similar) in the future again. I really like using the crock pot to cook up meals like this.

The picture shows my lunch bowl after I'd already eaten quite a bit of it.

This evening I had 3 oz of tequila with 20 oz of "Master of Mixes" Lite Margarita Mixer. These were really nice. I recommend the mixer. (I drank about half the bottle, but will replace it when it is gone. Walmart carries it). I am not a normal drinker, but I went to my future sister in law's bridal shower the other day and had a couple margaritas and liked them a lot. (I used to HATE margaritas). I expect my weight will be up tomorrow from water retention.

Daily totals:

1522 calories, 85.2 grams fat, 56.0 grams carb - 10.6 fiber = 45.4 grams NET carbs, 27.9 grams alcohol, 93.8 grams protein

49%f, 14%c, 25%p, 13% a (alcohol)

245.0 (9:45am)

Breakfast (noon): 5.82 oz strawberries, coffee with 41 grams heavy cream, 8 drops EZ-Sweetz

Lunch (1pm): 13.19 oz iceberg lettuce, 1.98 oz cooked bacon bits, 3.07 oz frozen green peas, 0.63 oz green onions, 99 grams cheese, 3 hardboiled eggs, 2.54 oz mushrooms, 64 grams mayo, splash rice vinegar, 8 drops EZ-Sweetz, pepper and onion powder

I should have eaten half the salad for lunch and half for dinner, but I ate it all at lunch. I am now STUFFED. I will see what happens this evening. If I need to, I will try to drink coffee with cream (instead of adding any more protein or carb grams to my daily intake).

It's now 8:20pm. I ate 2 large strawberries about an hour and a half ago and then had a diet cola. No dinner. I feel fine. I was worried that I would be starving all evening. It's interesting to me that I am not.

That salad was huge at lunch (check out the digital scale under the huge bowl for reference.

Daily totals:

1689 calories, 134.0 grams fat, 52.7 grams - 13.1 = 39.6 grams NET carbs, 73.2 grams protein

71%f, 12%c, 18%p

It was a kinda high day on the carbs. I am still not sure if I want to stick with as many as 1600 calories. Per fitday at 245.0 (sedentary) I am using 2683 calories per day. So eating 1600 calories per day should lead to a 2 pound weight loss per week. That's decent. I can lose as much as 3.5 pounds per week when I restrict below 1000 calories per day and exercise. But is that sustainable? If I always "fall off plan" because I am miserable, then should I use it as a means of losing weight? I don't know. Part of me wants to lose the weight really fast. The other part of me is getting older (I am 38 now) and wants to just lose the weight slow and steady and keep it off.

I am remembering that the definition of insanity is continuing to do the same thing and expecting different results. I have tried so many times over the last few years to make low carb eating work. I feel like there has to be a way that I can eat that leads to a lower weight and keeps my blood sugar in check, that doesn't lead to me eating "off plan" (binging) and gaining all the weight back (repeatedly).

245.2 (11am)

I am really pleased to see my water weight is down even more this morning. I had a lot of ketosis breath last night and the night before that. I also have been eating a lot of sea salt. (I eat it straight out of the container). I don't want to risk a muscle cramp. I took my dogs to the park yesterday, but only threw balls for them. I didn't do any exercise. I don't expect to want to do any exercise for some time. Not only have my knees been making cracking popping noises, but my throat has been sore for the last 7-10 days. (I need to get my tonsils out one of these days).

My plan continues to be to do LCHF with a higher calorie count this time. I think that trying to be too low calorie continues to derail me. When I do fall off plan, I can't get back on, because I've been experiencing chronic hunger for too long. I was cold a lot of the time, last in March when I was losing weight at a nice clip. I think now that I may do better over the long term, to resign myself to the fact that I can lose slower, but hopefully not fall "off plan". Maybe it would be a healthier way to lose the weight too. I am just so desperate to lose this weight, but what matters most is taking it off and keeping it off.

Breakfast (12:30pm): coffee with 50 grams heavy cream & 8 drops EZ-Sweetz

Lunch (1:45pm): 8 oz frozen green beans cooked with 3.8 oz cut up in to little pieces cooked ham. Then mixed with 25 grams heavy cream and 50 grams cheese.

Snack (4:30pm): 42 grams cashews

Dinner (6:30pm): 5.96 oz (cooked wgt) 80/20 ground beef patties with 19 grams blue cheese dressing

Daily totals (as reported the next day):

1595 calories, 120.2 grams fat, 36.7-9.6 grams fat = 27.1 grams NET carbs, 96.2 grams protein

66%f, 9%c, 25%p

246.8 (11am)

Breakfast (1pm): 1.80 oz (raw wgt) 80/20 ground beef, 2.72 oz (raw wgt) bacon, 3.00 oz celery, 5.54 oz mushrooms, then mixed with 2.47 oz sour cream, salt & pepper

What's nice about adding celery like this breakfast mix is that it absorbs the extra fat, so you can increase your fat percentage without the meal tasting greasy.

Dinner (7pm): 21 grams butter, 13.51 oz green cabbage, 100 grams cheese and 50 grams heavy cream, salt and pepper

This was really good. I sauteed the cabbage in the butter with a bit of water until it was soft, then just stirred it into a bowl with the heavy cream and cheese.

Daily total (as reported the next day):

1498 calories, 129.7 grams fat, 39.9 grams - 12.5 grams fiber = 27.4 grams NET carbs, 50.9 grams protein

77%f, 10%c, 13%p

252.4 (6:20am)

Breakfast (1pm): Coffee with 50 grams heavy cream and 8 drops EZ-Sweetz

Lunch (5:30pm): 1 Cup unsweetened almond milk with 26 grams Vanilla Designer whey, 5 ice cubes and some sugar free DaVinci pineapple syrup

Dinner (7:00pm): 4 oz (raw weight) 80/20 ground beef sauteed with 4 oz celery, 4 oz raw mushrooms and 8 oz green cabbage, then mixed into 2 oz sour cream

Snack (9:45pm): 7.80 oz cabbage with 2.93 oz (raw weight) bacon

Snack (10:15pm): 4.97 oz iceberg lettuce with 46 grams blue cheese dressing

Daily totals:

1587 calories, 131.6 grams fat, 48.8 grams -16.8 grams fiber = 32.0 grams NET carbs, 61.2 grams protein

74%f, 11%c, 15%p

248.4

O.K. - Obviously I have been eating well each morning and afternoon and then totally falling off plan each evening and eating whatever the heck I want. I am trying desperately to get back on track. My weight is back up 12.4 pounds from where I was. So not cool.

Breakfast (11am): coffee with 50 grams heavy cream and 9 drops EZ-Sweetz.

I really think the coffee with heavy cream in the mornings works really well for me. (Keeping me full for a long time, making sure that my gall bladder empties each day). I will continue to stick with that.

Lunch (2:15pm): 1 cup unsweetened almond milk with 1 scoop Vanilla Designer Whey, a few ice cubes and sugar free DaVinci Pineapple Syrup

I am going to be trying to have the coffee in the morning and then 2 protein shakes (around 2 and then 5pm) each day and then a dinner that has 4 oz beef/pork/ or chicken and a total of about 1 pound veg with about 2 oz sour cream in the evenings. That way I won't have to weigh my meals as much (although I guess I will still note them in fitday).

248.0 (10am)

247.8

242.6

So last time I had asparagus it was a shooting migraine and this time it was a horrible stomach ache. Could they both be reactive responses or does the allergy always manifest with the same body response?

Breakfast: 49 grams heavy cream, coffee & 8 drops EZ-Sweetz

Lunch: I made the following concoction and am eating about half: 4.20 oz raw celery, 4.97 oz raw cauliflower, 13.51 oz raw weight 80/20 ground beef, 1 can green beans, 4.00 oz sour cream and 1.99 oz cheddar cheese

240.8

Lunch (noon): 5.43 oz (raw weight) asparagus with 16 grams butter and 5.22 oz (cooked weight) t-bone (weighed without bone).

Snack (2:10pm): Coffee with 51 grams heavy cream, 8 drops EZ-Sweetz, a few drops of vanilla extract

Dinner (6:00pm): We got Chinese food from the Golden Harvest. I got an eggroll, sweet and sour chicken and fried rice. I also ate some chicken broccoli and chow mein and regular coke (not diet). I was STUFFED.

What I want to note for myself (for future reference) is that my stomach hurt like a son of a bun ALL afternoon and night long. Accompanied by horrible watery diarrhea ALL day. Was it the asparagus? The book "The Plan" says that asparagus is one of the more reactive foods. I remember feeling bad after eating asparagus last time and writing it in the blog, but don't remember the specifics. My abdominal pain was both right and left sides, the entire area from my lower ribs all the way down. The was some bloating, a LOT of stomach gurgling as well. I will go back and see if I specified the same thing last time I ate it.

I have another 3/4 lb of asparagus left and am now scarred to try it. I am going to try to have a LCHF non-reactive food day and then probably try it day after tomorrow.

240.6 (@ 11:45am)

:)

I am super happy that I have been able to get back on track the last two days. It looks as if I have lost all my water weight now, as well. In fact, I imagine my weight will go up tomorrow, as I don't think I should be quite this low again, this fast.

Last night I ate a LOT of French Grey Sea Salt. I had this twinge the day before yesterday that let me know that I could be in for night leg cramps (Charlie Horses) if I didn't pay attention to my minerals. I usually use "Morton's Lite Salt" which has a lot of potassium, but even though I bought a new container a couple months ago, I can't find it for the life of me. I refuse to buy a new one though (because I am stubborn like that), because the moment I buy a new one, I will find the one I already bought. Anyway, the French Grey Sea Salt (McCormick brand), seemed to take care of whatever salt/potassium issues I was having. I also think that it probably has some good minerals in there. Anytime I find the salt essentially delicious to eat (by itself), I think it is a good indicator that I should eat it and that I am low on something. I have tried some bouillon in the past (I have some great beef bouillon in fact), but I try to avoid MSG (headaches) and bouillon always seems to have a lot of MSG in it.

240.6 would mean I am only really up about 5 pounds since my low. That's a lot, but also not nearly as bad as it could be. I am right at 20 pounds below where I was Jan 1st 2012. That's pretty slow progress I guess. (1.25 pounds per month), but I CAN tell even as slow as the weight loss has been. I am hopeful to stay on track for a good long time (months or longer I hope!), and take off another good portion.

Breakfast (noon): coffee with 50 grams heavy cream and 8 drops EZ-Sweetz.

Lunch (2:10pm): 8.11 oz julienne sliced baby zucchini sauteed in 16 grams butter. 5.82 oz (cooked weight) chopped pork shoulder (really fatty pieces picked out and fed to my dog) mixed with 1.93 oz sour cream, salt, pepper and garlic powder.

This was surprisingly good. I wanted to make it with the stroghanof ground beef mushroom sauce I was eating a lot of a few weeks back, but I remembered I had the cooked pork shoulder in the refrigerator I needed to eat (so it wouldn't go bad). I prefer the ground beef mushroom sauce I was making in the past, but this WAS good. Unfortunately, I am already at 850 calories for the day, so not sure how much I can restrict my calories tonight. I'd rather eat higher calorie and not risk falling off track because of too high of hunger. I might head to the restaurant supply (Cash and Carry) and pick up another big box of mushrooms and a cabbage. The julienne slicer (I ordered off of ebay from China for $1.99 including shipping Item# 400407393591 green version - although I just looked at the price is now $2.69, but still a good value for this item) works great on the zucchini. I am also going to try it on carrots (in moderation with another veggie). I've also seen it used (online) with bell peppers or daikon radish, that would be low carb and delicious. I even think sauteed turnip would be excellent. I really find that the vegetables are what make this way of eating doable for me. You really have to come up with a way to add veggies that not only add volume to your meal, but also make it taste fresher and not so meaty and heavy. I think that is one of the biggest tricks to making this way of eating work. You can see in the picture above of my lunch, that the sauteed zucchini ended up being a good 1/2 of my meal at least. Not counting the butter that I sauteed the zucchini in (as I could have sauteed in a little water if I wanted to, to keep my calories a little lower), the zucchini was only 48 calories (7.2 carbs - 2.5 grams fiber = 4.7 NET carbs). As I love a LOT of different vegetables, I probably have more hope of success with this way of eating than other people do.

Snack (5:15pm): 3.81 oz jalapeno cheese

Snack (7:45pm): Hot cocoa made with 4 grams Hershey's baking cocoa powder, 10 drops EZ-Sweetz, 53 grams of heavy cream, hot water, a tiny pinch of salt and a couple drops of vanilla extract.

Daily Totals:

1,240 calories, 100.8 grams fat, 16.8 grams (-3.3 grams fiber) = 13.5 grams NET carbs, 69.3 grams protein

72%f, 5%c, 23%p

Before bed I again ate a bunch of French Gray Sea Salt. It tasted really good, so I probably needed it.

245.4 (9:00am)

Wow! I actually managed to not binge on crap food last night! It was my first day back on track in weeks. I am soooo excited to think I might be able to get back in ketosis and stay there. =)

Breakfast: coffee with 51 grams heavy cream and 7 drops EZ-Sweetz

Lunch: Can of kippered herring and salad made with 1 can of green beans, 100 grams of raw cauliflower, 19 grams mayo, splash of rice vinegar, a couple drops of EZ-Sweetz, garlic powder, pepper and salt

Dinner: 4.87 cooked weight pork shoulder (lean and fat eaten).

Daily totals:

1,008 calories, 76.2 grams fat, 17.9 grams (-7.9 grams fiber) = 10.0 grams NET carbs, 63.2 grams protein

68%f, 6%c, 26%p

Today was about as spot on with nutrition percentages and grams as I think I could get. I am very happy with those numbers. I cooked the pork in our new convection oven / microwave. I cooked with the convection setting for 2 hours at 300 F for a 23.5 oz piece of pork shoulder. It turned out really well, but took quite a bit longer than I thought it would. I will use this method in the future. I have quite a bit left over for the next couple of days too. I sprinkled it with salt, pepper, garlic powder, hungarian paprika and 2 drops of liquid smoke and then put a little bit of water in with it, so it wouldn't dry out too much.

246.0 (@ noon)

I have had the best of intentions every day for the last (3?) weeks and then have failed each day. I am going to try REALLY hard today to get back on track. I don't have any family functions to attend in the near future and I really want to get to feeling better again and losing some weight.

Breakfast: Coffee with 50 grams heavy cream and 8 drops EZ-Sweetz.

Lunch: 30 grams summer sausage and 87 grams Brie cheese

Snack 7:45pm : English cucumber with salt. (I forgot to weigh it, but will find the average for this type on the net).

Snack (9:30pm): 2 Cups unsweetened almond milk

Final Daily Totals:

683 calories, 56.6 grams fat, 16.5 grams (-5.9 grams fiber) = 10.6 grams NET carbs, 28.8 grams protein

73%f, 10%c, 18%p

(it is the next day now... I am so happy that I was able to finish the day without binging on a bunch of carb junk. I feel like this might be a new start!)

247.6

Breakfast (11am): 50 grams heavy cream, coffee & 7 drops EZ-Sweetz

Lunch (2:45pm): 67 grams Brie cheese

Snack (3:15pm): 40 grams summer sausage and 5 grams dijon mustard

Snack (3:30pm): 79 grams cashews

245.8

Breakfast (11:00am): coffee with 50 grams heavy cream and 9 drops EZ-Sweetz.

Lunch (3:45pm): took a lb of ground pork shoulder and spiced it with cayenne, garlic powder, salt, pepper, cumin and red pepper flakes. I then mixed in about 5 ounces of cream cheese (about 5/8 of a block) and spooned it into 6 large jalapeno peppers that had been split in half and cleaned. I am now baking the peppers and will have them later. For lunch I had the pork/cream cheese mixture (about 1/4 - 1/3 of the mixture) on top of iceberg lettuce with about 1/2 a cup of salsa. That was really good and filling.

Per fitday, if I can keep to eating the peppers tonight and nothing else I will end the day at:

1,923 calories, 150.6 grams fat, 48.4 grams (-8.4 grams fiber)= 40 grams NET carbs, 99.4 grams protein

70%f, 9%c, 21%p

I have been having a heck of a time getting back to low carb. I will be happy with today if I can stick to just having the jalapenos tonight. Although the calories are high, they are fine for slow weight loss.